Playstation All Stars – The Dream Roster
These people should be in Playstation All Stars! Who’s your favourite?
With a history as rich and varied as the Playstation’s, upcoming fighter/massive Super Smash Bros. clone Playstation All Stars is really shaping up to have a potentially massive library of cool people to play around with. We don’t know exactly who’s in it yet apart from the officially revealed characters, so what better time than now to draft up a dream roster filled with Playstation’s greatest mascots, heroes and generally random characters?
This guy has to be in it. Crash, although he’s since fallen on harder times, used to be awesome. Essentially the face of the Playstation during the 90′s, us oldies still remember his original adventures extremely fondly. His popularity at the time rivalled that of Nathan Drake in the modern world, so Crash is a force to be reckoned with.
Mute, capable of exploding in various different hilarious ways and donning a pair of blue trousers for no apparent reason, Crash would bring his unique array of mad attacks to the All Stars arena and kick some backside as only Crash can. His special moves would naturally includes Aku Aku mask with traditional ‘OOOOGABOOGA!’ shout, a wumpa fruit bazooka and – of course – his trademark spin attack. It’d also be great to see little to the Crash series such as his polar bear, Tiny the Tiger and plenty of question mark crates.
Spyro The Dragon
He may have been the smallest, purplest dragon in the entire kingdom, but Spyro still kicked the snot out of multiple annoying nemeses over several different games on the Playstation One. Since those days he’s been through a few different phases, working through the awkward PS2 phase, moving on to the next-gen and then finally showing up, looking very evil, in last year’s Skylanders.
In his older games, Spyro’s specialist range of moves included his trademark burst of fire, gliding, charging after the annoying thieves (Nya, nya, nya, nya, nya), stronger fireball attacks and a whole range of other elemental breath moves.
Probably the most famous face Sony has at the moment is an absolute must-bet for All Stars. By bringing his stumble-y jumping, wise cracking persona to All Stars Nathan Drake would show all of those lesser mascots exactly why he’s still top of the Sony mountain, booting anybody who disagrees squarely in the testicles.
Naturally Drake’s arsenal would include superior jumping/climbing abilities, an array of guns to commit mass genocide with, and his hand-to0hand expertise that he mysteriously gained in Uncharted 3. Also, wouldn’t it be damn to cool to have a stage set in the Uncharted universe where you fall out of planes and stuff?
Already said to be in the game but not yet confirmed, the hero/anti-hero of Infamous is an ideal fit for the All Stars Battle Royale. Over the course of his first two adventures Cole was as evil or as goody-two-shoes as you cared to make him, and his powers change depending on which side of the karmic scale he tips towards.
As it’s pretty impossible to integrate a moral code into a Smash Bros. style game, it’d be a good idea to have players be able to select whether they want to be evil or nice Cole, with the character’s electricity attacks changed to reflect this. Cole’s attacks would naturally include his usual electro-bolts, his tornado and ice attacks, his cattle prod and gliding abilities.
He may have done the – GASP – shocking jump over to Smash Bros a couple of years back, but Snake was still one of the most exclusive faces of the Playstation for years on end. Everyone knows who he is, how awesome his arsenal is and how well he integrates into the fighting environment, so it seems he’s a shoe-in for All Stars.
The only thing holding him back is his appearance in Smash Bros., which leaves it up-in-the-air whether Sony will decide to include him or not.
Since this guy’s been an integral part of Sony’s American ad campaigns for years now, it’d be great to see the always hilarious Butler make an appearance in All Stars.
Technically not a game character, Butler has still been such an important part of Sony for so long that it would be really cool to see him in All Stars, battling the various characters he’s been helping to promote. His appearance is already rumoured, so it looks like it might be likely!
Another Playstation poster child just like Crash Bandicoot but substantially more busty. Lara has since had her adventures appear on other consoles, but during the 90′s the annual Tomb Raider adventure was one that had Playstation gamers salivating for more shots of Lara’s increasingly better looking backside and growing breasts every single year.
Seriously though, Lara Croft is a good contender for All Stars. Not only does she have a long history with Playstation, but Croft is also a born fighter. Her moves would include her dual pistols, the swan dive head-splat, grenade launcher and a deadly finishing manoeuvre known only as ‘The Jiggler’.
Another pretty obvious choice. The star of Little Big Planet 1 and 2 is now one of the most recognizable mascots currently on the market, mainly due to his gosh-darn cute face and his loveable grins.
If included in All Stars, Sackboy should come in an array of different costumes, have access to his trademark weapons from LBP2 like the cake gun, and be able to taunt enemies using his arm-flailing, grinning/grimacing moves.
Wielding his trusty keyblade and magical attacks, Sora would bring the much needed impossible-hairstyle factor to All Stars.
Ratchet and Clank
If these two aren’t in, I’ll par-broil my best hat in garlic butter and eat it. There’s been few Playstation franchises in history that have enjoyed the popularity of Ratchet and Clank, and due to the fact that Ratchet has so many great weapons he’s a perfect fit for the All Stars arena.
Special moves would include the R.Y.N.O, Clank’s helicopter-pack capabilities and access to Ratchet’s trusty wrench.
Jak and Daxter
If these two aren’t in, I’ll then fry another, slightly larger hat and sit down to scoff that as well. Every bit as popular as Ratchet and Clank, Jak and Daxter were in direct competition with the other duo for many years during the Playstation 2 era.
Wielding Jak’s morph gun, his light/dark Eco powers and various ankle-biting moves courtesy of Daxter, these two would fit snugly into the combat arena.
It’s old stitch-lips himself! Star of the first three Oddworld games, Abe’s Odyssey, Exodus and Munch’s Odyssey, Abe is perhaps well known for his trademark ‘Hello! Follow me!’ and farting in the face of his fellow mudokons.
He’s also an able fighter thanks to his chanting, slapping and possession abilities. Since he was one of the most popular characters of the PS One he simply must be included. Make it happen Sony!
The star of Soul Reaver may be undead, but that’s just another reason to include him because he’s more than likely a bit annoyed about it. Betrayed by his fellow Vampire Kain and cast into a pit to die, Raziel was born again as an undead creature able to wield the spectral Soul Reaver sword.
Raziel’s attacks would include his gliding abilities, his various Soul Reaver sword forms and his soul-sucking power.
Look ma, no….arms? And legs, if you’re being correct. Yes Rayman may lack in bodily appendages and may well have appeared on every system under the sun at some point in another, but that doesn’t negate the fact that he’s:
A) One of the most recognisable characters around
B) Had his first adventure on the Playstation
Rayman would naturally bring his helicopter hair, wind-up punch, mosquito pals and a whole load more to his All Stars fighting style.
Now here’s one I bet a lot of you don’t remember! Croc was actually one of the first games I got for the Playstation, and it remains to this day one of the most underrated platformers of the nineties. Featuring lovely 3D worlds, tons of stuff to collect, mad little creatures called Gobbos and a massive difficult curve towards the end, Croc holds a special place in my heart.
Given that Smash Bros. relies heavily on obscure nostalgia I’m hoping Sony follows suit and includes Croc. It’s not likely though.
Sir Dan Fortesque
Similar to Croc, the star of the evil MediEvil franchise may well be too long dead-and-buried for anyone to really care about his inclusion.
If he was included, Dan would bring his vast arsenal of weapons, both normal and crazy, to bear the might of the undead against his All Star foes.
The guy has a great name as well by the way. Just sayin’.
The wise-cracking lizard had multiple adventures back in the day, each of which was really quite awesome. Known for his relentless one-liners, slightly-adult style of innuendo and his tail thwacking/bouncing abilities, Gex is perhaps still a little too obscure for the game.
We can hope though, right?
In fighting games the current trend is to feature characters that are from other franchises as well, so let’s see who we may have.
The most recognisable feature of Bioshock is an intimidating foe. While he may not be playable in All Stars it’d be extremely cool to see some sort of reference to Bioshock in there, particularly because it’s such a memorable experience.
If he was a playable character though, Mr Bubbles would bring his drill attacks, missile launchers and plasmids into the fray and show all those pesky Playstationers a thing or two!
Ezio Auditore Da Firenze
Although not the only protagonist of Assassin’s Creed, the fact that he’s been the main character in three of the titles in the series makes Ezio the most likely to appear in All Stars.
I don’t know exactly why I think he’ll appear but everyone loves an assassin. Plus it would tie in with Assassin’s Creed III, due out later this year.
Final Fantasy Character(s)
Again pretty unlikely, but I personally want to see Cloud/Sephiroth entering the All Stars arena, complete with Final Fantasy 7 themed stage. That’d just be cool.
Who’d We Miss?
That concludes our list, but we know we probably missed somebody who only exists in your vast library of obscure knowledge. That’s exactly why we want you to comment below and tell us who we should have included!